So I went to Korea...the beginning of something new.

If you didn't get to see any pictures, I will share some first experiences here and include brief intermixed excerpts of the rare journal entry or two I wrote. :)

I went to Korea for 2 weeks on a whirlwind of a journey. I barely had time to process the events as we moved from one place to the next so fast. I was honored to be able to go to Korea with the InKAS Summer Camp program. InKAS stands for International Korean Adoptee Service. During our 10 day trip we traveled to various cities, toured cultural sites, learned a large amount of history, and made many friends. I also received the opportunity to reconnect with my Korean biological family, meet my brother from my real adoptive family (+ his bff and bf's gf) and spend the last few days of my journey meeting many old friends. I planned on journaling or spending time processing through the trip, but found myself rather busy meeting people and keeping up with the excitement.

Even three weeks after my return, I come back to ponder remembering the people I met and the novel experiences in South Korea.  Not until landing in Korea, did I realize how blessed I am to know so many precious people all in one small country.  There are many people in my life connected to that country. Korea will always have a large place in my heart regardless of where I live in the world.  

Koreans are very hospitable to their foreign friends and especially loving and kind because of what they call "jeong" - a special term for a deep bond, love, or affection only known in Korean.  I was warmly welcomed and experienced this feeling of "jeong" immediately after arriving in Korea.  

The first day, I landed at 430am and had the whole day free. I spent some time lollygagging around the airport until shuttle service opened, soaking in the "fresh" hot, humid Seoul air. I use quotes here because I actually arrived on one of the hottest days of the year thus far and on a day with "ozone layer" warnings cautioning people to be careful and stay indoors because the air was so dirty! I began to process the weight of what was to be on my shoulders as I journeyed forward. On the limousine bus, I did some deep breathing and meditative prayer to prepare my mind for the next couple of days.  I felt extremely peaceful and in a state of complete serenity.  I knew that this is where I was meant to be at this very time. 

I checked into my guesthouse. It was really uncomfortable, and the beds had some bugs or dirt in them, but the joy and exhilaration of being Korea alone overrode any negative feelings.  God only knows if I'll be living like this in a developing country or a country that doesn't have clean running water one day, so I figured I might as well let this be the beginning of that experience (even though I paid a lot for the room!).  By noontime, within four to six hours of landing, I was waiting outside of the all too familiar Sinchon subway station. The Sinchon area is home to some of the best universities including Yonsei, Ewha, and Sogang as well as lots of nightlife, food, bars, shops, and things to do for the young crowd.  I met with JH (friend's initials for anonymity), a good college friend. 'twas a beautiful day spent with this friend. She took me to a park where we walked around and then found a shady spot to rest and converse. It had been 3 years since we last met. Though much time had gone by, we reconnected like best friends picking up where we left off. We both hadn't changed a bit, we even looked the same. (Agh, I'm trying to look older! My baby Asian face doesn't always gain me the most respect or best treatment in the real world.) That evening another friend barged into the room with the guesthouse owner while I was deeply sound in my REM sleep finally able to rest after almost 30 to 40 hours of no sleep and a whole lot of jetlag. After the initial shock, and eventually coming to my senses she pulled me out of bed. We went out around 9pm and enjoyed a hot soup called samgyetang made up of a whole chicken. Eating this hot soup on a hot day increases sweating to cool the inner body. This lovely friend stayed the night.

The second day I met up with a different friend I briefly met during her last week in San Diego before returning to Korea. She asked me to meet her if I went to Korea. I kept that promise!  

That evening,  the Korean adoptee fun began with our welcoming dinner. I sat with my roommate and her friends from the Netherlands and the special Danish guy on the trip! From that moment, people began building friendships and sharing their stories. We were each fascinated with the number of other people present in the room from different countries clothed with various expressions of curiosity. We began to engage in social activities and travel the countryside with the help of some of the best leaders, organizers, and one of the most amazing women I've ever met - the President of InKAS. Her story and history deserve its own post in itself. She inspires me beyond comprehension.

My connections to Korea and friendships extended around the world after meeting adoptees on this trip from many different countries such as Canada, the Netherlands, Australia, and France. Each and everyone of the adoptees had a very unique experience and background. Though different, we all shared the bond of being born in Korea and displaced or moved to grow up in another culture and country from the one of our blood.  This common factor brings the Korean adoptee community together creating an immediate connection. Korean adoptees as a whole have a unique history, a history that wants to be known and communicated to the Korean community.

We visited more sites than I can remember. We walked around Gyeongbokgung Palace in Seoul, watched Nanta, traveled down to Mokpo to  visit the orphanage, met college students, toured a factory where gochujang sauce is made, visited COEX, went to the National Assembly, walked through Independence Hall in Cheonan and so much more. It was quite a trip.

The trip also had a fair share of its challenges and mini culture shocks. Having been to Korea in the past, I still find myself surprised by some of the differences. Despite these challenges, each time I return, I become a stronger person. There's always a new piece of me I didn't know existed until I return to the Motherland. Many of the other participants felt the same. After the short trip, several fellow participants already began making drastic changes altering the course of their life path.

I had been longing to go to Korea and only through a special opportunity such as returning with a program like InKAS was I able to return. To InKAS, I'm beyond grateful and indebted to you for this opportunity. Because of this trip, my eyes were opened to a parts of Korean history not only fascinating but relevant to the history of orphans and adoption in and out of Korea.  

This trip was only the beginning of many new things to come. I pray that my faith in the unknown circumstances of my current life situation will continue to grow as I prepare to find new ways to not only rediscover my own identity but give back in a relevant way that uses my life experiences.

So it is...


More to come later!

PS. I'm sorry the photos are really bad. My computer crashed and I have no good source for photos at the moment. Editing to come  

The Expat Life Video

This morning I found a video called "The Expat Life" in Seoul, South Korea on the internet. It's a professional video with future episodes to come following the lives of some expatriates in Seoul.  It highlights the lives of the characters, their reasons for visiting Korea and staying, and some of their thoughts about the future as they determine whether or not to make Seoul home for awhile longer.
I expected only a brief five minute video, but soon discovered that it was a full 20 minute plus video about expat life.  It gave me all of the warm fuzzy feelings of the memories of living in Korea.  [ I did not live in Seoul.]

After living in Korea, I find myself able to identify with the people in the video. As soon as I returned to America, I had a desire and longing to return to the motherland.  Many people I know changed the course of their lives after visiting Korea.  In fact, a three week trip led me back to Korea the very next year to teach English and learn about my Korean heritage as a Korean American adoptee. Some friends have been in Korea for several years. Some only a few months with plans to say several more.  Others returned to their states to major in Korean studies or language and fulfill newfound dreams abroad.  Whatever your purpose and goal for going abroad, it will change you.

Check it!

http://vimeo.com/53194281

nourishment

BEWARE: Random tangents and lots ...

On Friday night I considered going to Busan. I wanted to meet with others, but their plans were not solidified. Regardless, something needed to happen. I wrote down a list of some touristy and site-seeing destinations I wanted to visit (and never got to more than two of them, which is fine, fine).

i had not yet seen the fall colors, something i miss dearly after spending some high school years on the east coast, and needed some time to refresh. Although I considered Seoul again, it was time for a much needed break. I longed to be away from everything here and in the presence of the creator. I longed to feed myself in more than one way.

soo...despite not knowing what my friends were doing, I was Busan

bound alone. 1 bus to the bus station --> 1 hour+ long bus ride to Daejeon --> 40 minute bus ride to the bus terminal in daejeon, and a --> 3+ hour ride brough

t me to Busan.... the loooooooooooong trip WAS GLORIOUS, indeed.

on this journey, my eyes and soul were fed. I was so thankful^^ that I was able to see the beautiful mountains and trees, catching the last glimpse of Autumn colors as the leaves fell from the trees and winter began to blow its way in with a chill. (IT WAS FREEZING this weekend!)

My spirit was fed.

On Saturday.... I read 1st and 2nd Corinthians, Galations, and Ephesians +. I began to dig in and cherish a word of comfort and encouragement. I've been so torn up about my decision to stay in the same shigol/city until summer that I haven't slept at night. the kids at school are getting crazier and there is a lot of uncontrollable frustration and tension... Sometimes I

live in the WORLD, living up to someone else's expectations and letting my heart and patience go. While talking to my K scholar again tonight, we considered giving

up if we weren't working together in the future.. but NOOO. That's not the point. "I suck" (as some koreans say when they feel they are bad at something) in a lot of ways. Life away from our comforts and norms is not easy, but these are the test and trials we are to endure as we build strength to build up others. I came to love and share the light I'm given. instead of becoming hard and angry with my students, i must remember what it is to love. because i was loved , i can love..... . (Please help me love the child that I'd rather ask to leave and never come back for she, too, is hungry and broken; please let the light shine through. ---For he who said, "Let your light shine out of darkness", made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.

Back to the story: during my travel, I discovered that friends were heading in the same direction. so.....another 45 minute subway ride brought me to 자갈치 , the huge fish market.

and so my stomach was fed! We had the most delish, fresh

seafood for lunch. ...so fresh it was moving as we scorched it over the fire bringing it to its final seconds of life. ) :

then we ate pho. The best pho in Korea.

Then, we had waffles...

Then, we had 찜질방 food. Satisfaction at its best.

We landed at a decent 찜질방 (a lot of people come through here?) near the area we spent most of the time shopping and eating.... it had a fantabulous view and refreshing baths... (and Angella got an amazing pic of the bridge that lights up with different colors at night.)

After a short sleep, I woke up at 5am to someone's obnoxious alarm and decided to rise in awe of the night lights. As dawn approached, the ships headed out to 'sea' one by one and two by two, more and more they came. I watched the clouds roll in and out and...

dark become light... and night become day.... (cell phone pics) :

~some of them went out to sea on on ships, they were merchants on the mighty waters~

~where morning dawns and even fades, you call forth songs of joy~

if i rise on the wings of the dawn, if i settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me

해운대

~he has made his light shine upon us~

Then retracing my travel, back I came the next day. The real world!!

As the week progresses, I will continue to find meaning in life and my purpose here despite the obstacles in our way.

Peace

Clarity in the darkness

I've been reminded of Psalm 23 several times in the past week and weekend. It was once one of my favorites. Although it is often associated with funerals/deaths because of it's popular use at funerals (at least on t.v. -that's reality, right? never used it in a service I attended) I find this piece relevant to my life.

Even though I may be walking through difficult times and dark passages (certainly not the darkest valleys as this passage suggests), I am comforted by the almighty comforter. I walk in uncertainty of my personal teaching situation and location, for the setup was not as I originally envisioned. but in his presence I am guided on paths of righteousness. Even though I live not in the place and countryside I envisioned, I realize how much beauty there is among the students and people around me.

Everyday is a challenge that deserves little complaint and a pause to remember what we came to do. Only in times of shadow and uncertainty, do we really understand the need to be still before we can see the light which brings clarity. as in..."when it is dark enough, you can see the stars." I must've quoted this a few times, too....I just love it.

"he leads me beside still waters"

Our excursion through 대구 looking for 찜질방 brought us to the wrong side of town (the cab driver...). I admit it was frustrating, but as we were directed out to find another cab or place to stay, we had been led to still waters. This was one of the best parts of the weekend, not to mention being in the presence of some amazing people. As the city lights shined on either side and to the right highrises reached for the sky, the view of a body of water along the cityside was breathtaking. He truly leads us beside still waters. Here I felt the serenity in the peace of the night.

The journey and path we take is not perfect. There are some rugged regions and pits we may stumble into and out of...but how we rebound and work through these spots in our journey, builds us.

--

Last weekend, I also met my Korean family. People that come to meet their relatives, often say there is an intense set of emotions. Indeed, there was. If you care to know, I'll talk to you or process this later. It is still difficult for me to fathom.

Today was a really challenging day at work. The students were not compliant and happy with what was supposed to be a really good lesson.... The song was bomb at training and went over well with other same grade levels in different schools...but it just didn't work out. I will try harder and know that tomorrow is a new day. not everything is perfect.

The scholar and I asked about one of the Kindy students. (He's so cute, I named him Patrick because he was wearing Spongebob for awhile and really likes Spongebob. Most students had names already) The teacher said he was one of the older students that has developmental issues. He usually skips his sessions and sleeps through them, but he came for English class today. I was deeply touched and will remember above all of my bad days that I am here to teach and care for these students. I want to understand his story, everyone's story. The power of a story.... He's been one of my favorite students. I always fall for these types without realizing it. Please help me to love each individual.

Anyway, I have some major LPing magic to do.

Peace and cheeri0