looking back helps me look foward

I keep looking back...looking back at Korea, looking back at my adventures while dreaming forward to Korea and other service projects if they are to become a reality again. Where is time going? Last year I traveled a lot for work, pleasure, and personal emergencies.

I keep looking back at the past...remembering good things...It's great I have memories to look back upon, but today is different. I need to look at today and accept that it is not the same.  I do not know when I will return to Korea. I do not know where I'll be next week or next month.

Instead, I'm going to look back with a smile only to motivate me to keep moving and progressing in a forward direction.  Right now that looks like having my health, being well, becoming stronger, and living in the present.  I can create new memories everyday! Hence, why I started the #100happydays challenge!

As I look forward, there are many things I want to accomplish and places to be. I am going to continue to set those goals in motion by doing what I know is within my capability on a daily basis.  In many ways, I am living at the mercy of others in faith with no control of my surroundings or my future. I promise to stand strong, positively looking up, believing and doing the little things that slowly get me closer to my goals and dreams.

This week includes exercising, sleeping, and studying even if for only ten minutes each per day.  That is what I can do. That is what I will do.

Let's keep fighting!
화이팅!!^^

this is me

this is me

the simple

the complex

the mundane

the introspective

the unsettled

the light

the hope

the resilient

the fighter

the giver

the power

the peace

the creative

the crafty

the sick

the strong

the foodie

the loved

the korean

the adopted

this is me

Tea: my non-traditional tasty delight.

This is a post from last year that may (or may not) have been published, but in the editing phase it bumped it up to today.   Enjoy! : )


This week I awoke with an intense tea-craving for which I have not yet fulfilled!  I was in Trader Joes, a health foods store here in America, with my mom and walked by the tea section. I saw a box of pomegranate white tea! It looked delicious, but right now I'm on a no caffeine kick. Although I now know it has less caffeine than natural green tea, I'm trying to hold strong to the no caffeine.  Pomegranate is delicious and white tea is loaded with antioxidants, all the good stuff that helps you fight off illness and bad things in your body! The combination is difficult to beat. Pick some up if you have the chance.

The color of pomegranate white tea reminds me of one of my favorite Korean teas: omijacha.  It literally means five-flavored tea and is supposed to satisfy the five distinct tastes (sweet, sour, salty, bitter, pungent).  This tea, often slightly bitter to first time tea drinkers, is made of a berry from the schisandra chinensis vine originating from China and is used in herbal medicine. The red berries have healing properties that can soothe the raspiest cough or open up the airways of asthmatic individuals. They're also known for keeping the liver healthy and helping digestion among other properties.  Don't take my complete word for it! You'll have to try it yourself!  No one individual will react the same way. If it doesn't work for you, just enjoy knowing you're putting something tasty and healthy into your body! I'd be down for a cup of omijacha any day.  The flavor and health benefits are too good to be true.

With the thought of omijacha comes the flooding memories of my first experience drinking it  at a cultural village in a tea house in South Korea. I remember traveling with a group of new friends in 2008 in the Joellanamdo province. After a day of touring the cultural site, learning about pottery, and creating some traditional Korean crafts, we sat down for a refreshing cup of tea. Because it was my first time ordering tea in Korea, I looked at the menu and chose something that sounded flavorful and looked pretty. Of course I don't judge a book by it's cover or a person by his looks! I just have a peculiar interest and obsession with the presentation of food and beverage. Presentation is half the taste. If it looks good, it should taste [at least a little] good!  I chose the iced omijacha to soothe my soul and cool down on a day of humid delight.
My first, and definitely not my last, tea experience was amazing!  I knew I loved tea. However, this experience sealed the deal and developed a long-lasting relationship and devotion to Korean tea houses.

Kale Kimchi Omurice and a kind Korean Ahjussi

Today I walked around downtown to do some exploring and spend quality time with myself. Who stays cooped up inside when the sun is shining and its almost 70 degrees in January? Not me!

Look at that beauty of a day!

After my adventures,* I decided to get more adventurous with my food. With an hour of exercise and three hours of walking in the sun later, I worked up an appetite. Though I drank a delicious green drink packed with kale, spinach, broccoli, apple, etc that I picked up at the Farmer's Market and my typical daily fix of a Kind bar,  I still figured I better eat a good evening meal. As usual, I didn't have much food and will need to go grocery shopping soon, so I made something up with the random foods I had. I came up with a rather fun and tasty kimchi and kale omurice! It probably exists somewhere, but I'd like to think I created something for once!! I come up with great ideas --more like yours truly reinventing the wheel. Hey, at least I can find how to best cook up what creative idea is brewing in my head if I need help bringing it to fruition.

About the kimchi and kale omurice...

I tossed extra special "sprouted" brown rice in the rice cooker....don't ask. I bought it at HMart and it was triple the price of any other rice on the shelf. I was looking for brown rice and the package says sprouted is healthier for many reasons. I don't know. Better go ask a Korean to find the legit reasoning behind it. Basically it's good for health and solves some of life's problems? Sounds good to me!

While that was cooking, I made the egg. I mixed up two eggs in a bowl (add a bit of milk or water for fluff and texture). After greasing up the old pan, cooking up the egg and placing it on a plate, I moved onto the fried rice fixins.

I started with the kale. I used the last half of an older bunch of kale. I cleaned, cut, and cooked the kale, much like the blanching you do with spinach, and set that aside.  Next, I fried and cooked the kimchi. Once that was cooked I added the kale back to the pan. Oh yeah! I snuck some carrots in and attempted to add garlic after realizing it was a bit too old. You can add more veggies, meat or whatever leftovers are in the fridge. In the future, I'll be sure to have meat protein lying around. With some sesame oil and the kimchi veggie mix, I finally added the rice! Cooked it all up and placed it in the egg!
Finally, choose the sauce. You can add ketchup or gochujang on your omurice delightful creation. All I had was sriracha as you can see in the pic below. After taking the picture, I garnished it with leftover avocado. You can never have too much avocado in any shape or form and it goes great with omelettes. The kimchi kale omurice was a lot of yumm in my mouth and quite a bit of food!
PLUS! It had kale. As far as I'm concerned, anything with kale is healthier. It's a super food! Right? Heck! You can argue the whole thing is healthy. Kimchi, kale, sprouted brown rice, egg, and sriracha. The only thing not so healthy is the sesame oil, but you've got to throw some in for the sake of having oil and that extra flavor!

Here's the creation::

Enjoy~~

Wanna try it? Make your own rendition and let me know how it works or tastes for you!

Have fun!

*Because this blog supposedly touches upon Korea related things, I'll add the part of my day where I met a Korean man (definitely ahjussi status!!) on my walk. He has lived in the US for quite some time but is originally from Daegu! Crazy! [I have this weird thing with ahjussis and boys/people from Daegu. I love Daegu dialect and happen to be able to find or attract random people from Daegu.] As I was walking, I noticed a cute dog that reminded me of my family's childhood dog. I stopped to ask the breed of his dog not knowing he was Korean...and a friendly one at that!  His dog is a maltipoo (Maltese/Poodle mix) and our childhood dog was a Bichontese (Bichon Frise/Maltese mix). They look very similar. My!...he was friendly. I knew he was nice based on the conversation with previous onlookers, but just how....I didn't know.  He asked me to sit next to him and take a picture with him and the dog. I politely declined!  He then asked if I was Korean. Apparently he could tell. I said, yes. He started speaking in Korean. Not that I needed to, but I did explain that I was adopted. I really hate when people, especially older people make assumptions and project their expectations wanting me to act culturally appropriate or speak perfect Korean. Sometimes I think by telling you I was adopted it will mitigate any strong expectations or predispositions. Who knows.

Once he found out I was Korean AND adopted he again asked me to sit down right next to him and talk. "Please!! Dear," he pats his hand down on the bench next to his lap and dog, "have a seat next to me and let's talk!" Again, I politely declined. I knew I'd be stuck there if I sat down. He is married folks! Nothing like that! (or so I hope!) He has a Caucasian wife and was giving a Korean friend and her child visiting from Korea a tour of various parts of California. They were off whale-watching while he was holding down the fort and taking care of the dog. He really wanted me to sit there and chat him up for another hour, so I could meet the woman and her 8 year old kid. Supposedly the woman spoke really good English. I talked with the ahjussi for a little longer [interesting guy] and I decided to carry on with my own day. As much as I'd love to meet more Koreans, I needed to get going.  I also love Korean kids and listening to them speak in Korean. Part of me wanted to meet them. I love the sound of the language. If not to communicate with my Korean family, I'd learn Korean to speak Korean with my future kids!  I must admit, I love having lots of older Korean friends with kids. As I walked further, just a minute later, I saw a Korean family with a very cute daughter under the age of 5.  My heart melted when I heard the daughter speaking to her mother.Too bad kids have to grow up so fast!  I might have stopped to "observe" them for a minute while stepping aside to avoid photobombing three Korean girls taking pictures of each other by the water.  : )

The dog:

K. End.


~HK~

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! and I got my hair chopped off! Why o why?

As the holidays creep up like a gust of wind that catches me by surprise, I begin to reflect on the events of this past year! Many great things happened and some even more challenging events occurred that I never imagined. One of the highlights of my year was returning to Korea after three years to meet other Korean adoptees and reconnect with some of my best friends! How awesome is that?

BUT NOW it's the holiday Christmas season and I love it. Christmas can be very depressing to some, but I choose to be happy and think of happy things. It's a great time of year...from the meaning of Christmas itself to the decorations, the holiday cheer, and all the good people!I look back to my time in Korea and think about the many cultural differences. Christmas in Korea is definitely a couples holiday and then a religious holiday if you're religious.  It was quite the experience for me.  Though I was single while living in Korea and see myself being single for now, I can respect the differences and enjoy looking back at the memories of cute couples walking down the streets while I had dinner with a friend.

There are parts of the holiday season that I'm not a big fan of. I don't like big spending nor do I like the greedy consumer aspect of Christmas, but I do love giving whether it be in something small and crafted or my time and service.

This year I chose to give up my hair! I decided I would do it about three months ago and I only told a couple of people that I would do it. Not that they would remember, but I know that if I tell people I can't go back on my word. I was having second and third thoughts upon entering the salon. However, there were so many reasons I knew I had to do it!  I donated it to Locks of Love, an organization that makes hair pieces for children with cancer.

It's funny how after chopping off my hair I got varied views and opinions. It's always pleasant and fun to learn about new cultures, but also to gain different perspectives from the different people in regards to preferences, tastes and fashion. I walked out not 100% liking the cut I received because it was  not what I had asked of them, though it still looked like a good cut. I remember getting a similar cut my first week of living in Korea and deleting all of those pictures. I spent a couple of hours searching for pictures that I did like. My American/western friend acquaintances like it and think it looks okay, whereas my honest blunt Korean friends say go back and get it fixed. Hahahahaha friends. I love you all so much! I do plan to wait a few months and go back for one of the styles that better match my face and body.

As 2013 comes to a close, Christmas finds its way and the new year quickly approaches, here are some of the very personal reasons that I gave up my hair and other thoughts I had while actually getting myself out of bed to do it (yes, I was in bed sick all week and recovering from a quick visit to the hospital)::

• I wanted to give back and give something close to me to help others. Heck, my hair is a part of me and attached to me! 
• I also have a rare condition. I've never met people face-to-face in person with this condition. I know that it's not easy to endure so much physical and emotional suffering and sometimes the feelings of loneliness. Yet, there is so much hope and happiness in this life that I want to spread that joy to others. 
• I complain that the haircut isn't exactly what I wanted, but I am reminded how blessed I am to have hair. I can only be thankful that I still have my head full of hair!
• I can be happy thinking about a child receiving this gift. I hope that a child will be happy and blessed with a head of new hair. Boy did I have a lot! My hair could fill several heads. There's so much and it's sooooo thick! 
• I want to stop hiding. I like my hair being long and playing with it when I'm bored and I often use it as a way to cover up my body and "hide" from other things. I am ready to let it go. 
• I am looking forward to a new start and a new do might help push that change!
• My looks don't define who I am on the inside. Okay, so for Korean standards and many other cultures, looks are EVERYTHING.  Hey, I live in a America and while I try to look as neat and clean and live up to society's expectation only in as much as I need to get the job done and be respectful, I know that my identity is more than just what I look like.  I did have a good conversation with a woman that reminded me that looking good is okay and that it's our right to feel good. Yup, I agree!  I just don't want to focus too much on it! 
• I also want to think less and do more. I over think everything including the whole idea of getting the haircut. I knew I had to do it before Christmas or else I would think it even more into the new year. 
• I want to learn to give up more comforts. The past two years I lived in a lot of discomfort and there are a lot of things I don't have that I could use. However, I was blessed with much this year in some form or another. I hold onto things whether they be small material objects or past experiences or parts of me and my life that need to be put in the grave. 
• I am always learning, from this past year, and will continue to learn to let go.
• I want to take more risks. 
• This quote of John Piper's, though slightly taken out of context, is one that I want to remember, "If you are wired to see other people's faults and failures and offenses, and treat them roughly, you will not take risks for their joy." It is my hope that I will take risks for both others and myself! I want others to have joy!
• Cutting off your hair is LIBERATING.
• I am free to be who I was made to be and who I am.
• I like being happy. I like helping others and I like happy people.   

Cheers to the holiday season and the upcoming new year!! I can't wait. 

-HK-

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Here are some of the before and after pics: 

Thankful

Money can't buy happiness~~

Love, laughter, good friends, and a very hopeful spirit are blessings that bring joy beyond my own sometimes spirit of unbelief. 

I find myself caught up in the small details of life. AND some of the really big ones. Life has taken significant twists and turns since the passing of summer. New friendships, relationships, broken spirits, and renewed hearts to name a few.

It's November - the month of Thanksgiving here in the USA.  As I get lost in the heartache of the trivial things in life and some of the traumatic life changes, I stop to be still in a moment of thankfulness as I remember all that I am blessed to have right now .

Thank you~~~

As I continue in this Search of the Morning Calm  journey, I hope to continue in the spirit of thankfulness and begin to understand more of my Korean roots while persevering through the challenges of learning. 

Summer Samgyetang. Ginseng chicken soup.

Samgyetang (삼계탕) is a delicious hot ginseng chicken soup very popular in Korea during the summer, especially on bok days (복날 translated as dog days).
The bok days are the three hottest days according to the lunar calendar.
Chobok: 초복 (begginning)
Chungbok: 중복 (middle)
Malbok: 말복 (end)

Samgyetang is often eaten for its health benefits and supposed internal cooling. I know! In America we think cold cold cold when it's hot whereas Koreans think just the opposite! Battle fire with fire, they say! When your body is hot, your blood pools at the surface of your body for cooling. That often leaves the stomach and internal organs without proper circulation and  weaker digestion. By eating a hot healthy soup, your body not only gets nutrients but the proper cooling and circulation it needs.
In the past, dog was the meat of choice in the soup during those hot days. Chicken or samgyetang is the most common meal of choice now. It is traditionally eaten on these three days as a way to rest after a long days work and replenish the body with nutrients and energy.  It is tasty and rejuvenating.

For 2013 the bok or dog days fall on:

Chobok: July 13
Jungbok: July 23
Malbok: Aug 12

Samgyetang is a soup made with a whole chicken stuffed with rice, garlic, ginseng, ginger, and jujubes (dates). It is cooked and placed in a broth made for samgyetang. The broth comes in variations with salt and more spices or even creamy milky-like mixes and flavors while other times it is allowed to take on the flavors of the tasty stuffed chicken. A simple broth that soaks the flavors of the chicken is my favorite!

I made a new Korean friend in San Diego and in honor of Chobok we went on a journey to find samgyetang.  We found this delightful dish at "Old Village" Korean BBQ Restaurant on Convoy St in San Diego. I believe it costs $16.99 for one bowl.Believe me, it is worth every penny and I would go back for more! It tasted fabulous! Even my friend said there was no difference in taste and feeling from the samgyetang eaten in Korea.

I felt a little uneasy and queasy that day, but after eating the soup my stomach felt calm, satiated, and satisfied. I was happier and had more energy to take on the next day!  Old Village Korean restaurant has a lot of other varieties of good traditional flavors and Korean foods that you may also consider trying, if your stomach doesn't favor this ginseng chicken soup!

I hope you will taste your way to some samgyetang this summer. I'm ready for more. There are a few days left of summer. Rest and enjoy!!